“We love the pic of Blender Man, the agency’s lobby-based mannequin that reminds people to ‘walk in stupid every morning,’ Brit-speak for keeping an open mind.”

In the September issue of Fast Company, they made this comment about the blog Welcome to Optimism. I love the idea.

I’m heading out to Colorado tomorrow and won’t have any e-mail, cell phone, or voice-mail until Monday. That will be a BIG change for me.

This is the first really responsible vacation I’ve taken where I’ve lined up everything with other people so that I can go away and not feel any burden from missing opoprtunities.

All day I feel like I have been making phone calls and writing e-mails to people to let them know that I’ll be out for the remainder of the week. Every prospect I am working on has an info e-mail sent internally and had a verbal discussion with the internal contact who will help me while I am gone. In turn, every prospect got an e-mail from me telling them who to contact for any help.

It was difficult, but it is comforting to know that when I board the plane in the morning, it will all be in good hands here. I have full disclosed all relevant information to take care of my prospects.

I recently jotted down my thoughts on carrying out justice (or discipline) but over the weekend my thoughts have matured more. Try out this quote from Dale Carnegie:

Why
prove to a man he is wrong? Is that going to make him like you? Why not
let him save face? He didn’t ask for your opinion. He didn’t want it.
Why argue with him? You can’t win an argument, because if you lose, you
lose it; and if you win it, you lose it. Why? You will feel fine. But
what about him? You have made him feel inferior, you hurt his pride,
insult his intelligence, his judgment, and his self-respect, and he’ll
resent your triumph. That will make him strike back, but it will never
make him want to change his mind. "A man convinced against his will is
of the same opinion still."*

I have realized that I am more successful in life leading others by getting them to a point where they discover, on their own, what is the best decision. Positive reinforcement, encouragement, praise, accolades all work better than criticism, forcing, demanding, or directing.

No bribes, just leading through positive touches-kind words, helpful hints, and lavishing honest praise. As Carnegie said, "Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain – and most fools do."

*I cannot fully agree with this statement in disciplining children because it is our responsibility as parents to shape the will and character of a child, but shades of it are true. The positive continues to bring out the best character in my children.
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Seth Godin has some awesome points in doing the important now before it becomes urgent, making the difficult decisions first, and preparing before the last minute. He has become one of my favorite reads. Here is a quote from his post:

A quick look at the gradually failing airlines, retailers, and
restaurant chains we all know about confirms this analysis. They’re all
content to worry about today’s emergency, setting the stage for
tomorrow’s disaster. Better, I think, to wake up 10 minutes early, make
some difficult decisions before breakfast, and enjoy the rest of your
day.

I am learning this as a parent: Justice should be fair, public and swift.

Fair and consistent, according to the grievance, and equal for all.

Public so others learn that the action will be disciplined.

Swift for highest correlation to the action and quickest resolution to prevent reoccurence.

Cleared the white board yesterday b/c the consultant asked us for a list of the companies we need to see this fall. My list had 32 names scattered across the country; I am ready for about 5 of them.

His idea: plan the trips and force the preparation. Scary proposition, especially when we don’t yet have the equipment to make some of the items (pilot trials due in September). But, by setting the appointments and booking the travel, I will constantly have a real target that is forcing me and our team to be ready.

In high school, our church youth pastor would ask us what held us back from sharing our faith with our friends. Often, the answer centered around not being ready-some bad habit, not knowing enough, or not being prepared. Same thing with waiting until you are "ready" to get married or have kids. You are never really ready for something unknown.

Set the plans and do your best to be ready for them. If you don’t set the plans, you’ll end up doing nothing.

Today was a HUGE day for us… we got the go-ahead on one major equipment purchase and the go-ahead to trial a new, innovative process that will add some edge to our product offering.

I want to say it was a HUGE win for me, but I cannot. It would be too cheap. We got there together.

The consultant has often told me that the biggest part of being a salesman is being able to sell internally. OK. Check. File it away.

But, it is starting to make since for me. Finally. We have had some long discussions, some heated moments, and some seemingly insurmountable personaility obstacles in our team as we tried to improve processes and develop innovations in our operations. There were so many days I was ready to walk out the door at 2pm in frustration thinking nothing will change.

Then, it all began to fall in place. I realized that the only way we would ever move forward was if our team could agree, buy into an idea, and collectively sell it up the chain. I thought I knew the conclusion (I did), but it didn’t matter. No one else was on board. It was only our (the consultant and I) driving it that even kept it alive.

So, last week I decided to spend some quality face time with the other team members. No rounds of golf or old-fashioned smoozing. Instead, I just picked up my office (laptop and cell-phone) and went to the plant where they are so I could be seen by them and so that we could find casual, informal time to talk, go to lunch, and work towards solving some issues we had been facing.

I began a slow process of allowing the other team members to sell me on what they really wanted. It took patience, time, listening, and a good dose of shutting up. They sold me. Actually, we really want the same things. Now, it is their idea, their project, and their cause.

Then, together and separately we began selling up the ladder. It wasn’t just me any more. We were selling internally. Everyone who will be involved in the project is on board and working the guys on top to proceed. It was great. And it succeeded.

I’ve learned something, put it into practice, and enjoyed the fruit of the labor. That’s a great day!

Life is so short and can be so meaningless when we sit around and only share the surface, the polished exterior of our lives with each other. Especially in the south, people tend to put on their nice Christian clothes and act the part of a nice man. As Doc R hates with me, so many comments about someone are "he’s such a GOOD man" or "he’s a nice Christian man".

What?

The best friends, the most trusted colleagues, and the most respected mentors are those that are willing to be real. Real to me is measured by depth. The deeper you are willing to go, the more real you are.

Real-ness encompasses sharing the crap and sharing the wins. Real-ness willing to take a risk and be vulnerable with not only the scary real parts of life but more to look into your core with someone else to help each other understand why you are how you are.

I am afraid to look back over this and see if it makes any sense because it probably makes zero sense.

Whatever. I just want you to know that my life needs balance and I’ve got enough of the light,enough of the social, political and corporate climbing, enough of the niceties, enough of the fake.