3 weeks ago, Matthew Cornell posted a comment to one of my posts and said,

I like the idea of accountability – As I understand it, it’s crucial when my clients need to take on a new behavior. However, I personally find the hard-core christian angle off-putting. “terror to evildoers” sounds just like our president, whom I think is not a good role-model for taking responsibility.

His words have been resonating in my head since then. Tonight, I did a keyword search on “enemy” and started reading something incredible:

Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone… “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

Working as a team continues to be a strong theme in my learning experience. I should say that the theme is for an organization to be successful, it must function as a team.

A team is made of players, including me, who cooperate and work together towards success. In response to Matthew’s comment, I believe he is correct in the direction that he was heading. A mature Christian’s response is not to treat someone who has done wrong with wrath or terror. My responsibility as part of the team (but not the coach of the team) is to give my all in my work and also to do my best to build the rest of the team.

I’ll admit I am not the best at doing the “live at peace with everybody.” Ask anyone about my history and they’ll probably agree. But, hopefully they are beginning to see that I realize I am just one of the players, one of the teammates, and we all need each other in order to succeed, in order to take care of the customer, in order to grow our business.

So now, when someone else on the team doesn’t play by the rules and breaks the spirit of teamwork, my responsibility is to continue to build team and function as a team player. As the wisdom given says, “as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”

Friends give and friends receive. My dentist (if you are in metro Atlanta, and need a great one, let me know) is a good friend who will listen to my life stories, give me his thoughts, and provide me with some great humor. I thought he’d enjoy reflecting on this marketing challenge/question (as will many of us) that Seth Godin posted about earlier in the week. In addition, Godin linked to the 1997 National Spelling Bee finale video (click here). I hope that by sharing it, I would be giving something back.

I remain amazed at how critical communication is. Not only is it vital in order to accomplish large complex goals as a team, team members (or spouses or friends or employees) tend to “get ticked” when decisions are made or actions taken that affect them and they aren’t fully briefed on the situation.

I feel like I see this in our company, in other companies that I visit, in friendships and even in my family.

People like to feel important and I think being able to hear “straight from the source” what’s going on helps soothe their need to be included. Besides, what better way to let others give feedback on different courses of action, potential obstacles, or previous attempts that succeeded or failed.

The personality traits of a leader can distinctly influence the culture of an organization. What happens if you are the leader and your new talents’ personalities differ from yours? On the surface it sends the organization onto a potential path for major culture clash.

This week, I’ve learned some things that are critical for both the leader and the new talent to succeed and avoid the looming battle.

• Leader: understand the new culture and if you believe in the new talent (you hired them, after all) be humble enough to move away from your culture and towards their culture.
• Leader: foster candor. Create an environment in which new talent can openly discuss the culture.
• New Talent: have key trusted advisors who will provide counsel in case you get frustrated.
• New Talent: be candid. Ask direct questions, provide concrete solutions, and express your goals.
• New Talent: smile, be kind, be gentle, be humble.
• New Talent: be humble enough to move away from your culture and toward the leader’s culture.

As I was wisely reminded today, the best place to be is in between my personality (culture) and yours. Neither one are necessarily bad, neither right or wrong, but the best for the company is when we take the strengths of all the team players and combine them in the middle of the road.

Today marked 5 years at the company.

At 9am, we had .

I ate lunch at with POTC.

5 years past to reflect on many improvements,
5 (and more) years ahead to continue the progress.

What’s the one thing I am most concerned with today? Developing the team. I hope to spend a lot of time and energy because we (not I) need to succeed through progress. This is going to be a great (but not always easy) journey together!

This week I had a pretty tough situation where someone had committed to the group to complete a task in one way. But when they actually did it, they left off some of the critical steps that we had all agreed to. I know I am right and that they are wrong. I confirmed it. Twice. And shook my head in disbelief at what happened.

But tonight in Bennettsville, SC, I took a 6 mile run before dinner and listened to a talk on my iPod that POTC had passed along. Challenging as the run was, the words and advice that I listened to were even tougher.

In the world of people that we live in (people staff the production floor, people run companies, we work for people and people work for us, people are friends and enemies, etc.), I can make a choice about my attitude that is flat wrong.

This week, in this situation, I was right. But I was only 98% right. 98% of right/wrong regarded the decision we had made and the failure to follow-through. But, 2% of right/wrong regarded my attitude. All of my attitude was wrong. Although critical thinking and analyzing actions are critical in business, this time I let it cross the line and affect my attitude. I built my case then got angry about it.

That anger and my poor attitude makes me the loser. It makes people think of me as an arse. And, unfortunately, I have done it more than once.

Yes, I do believe that we must judge people’s work to a high standard (the ideal would be perfection). But,

1. My attitude must be positive. As a good friend has mentioned to me on multiple occasions, “Look for good around you.” We are all on the same team working toward the same goal. A negative attitude will only harm the team.
2. Move on. Build my case, state the facts, share them with the proper folks and help in corrective action. Then move on. Don’t let it be personal or emotional.

I know I was right, but I didn’t do anything to build the company and my attitude showed. And I dug a little hole for myself with others that I’ll have to climb out of now. Sure, I was right, but my attitude made me the loser.

P.S. I really do hate learning this stuff. It’s pretty embarrassing and really very difficult to work through. For most of you, you probably scratch your head and ask, “What’s so hard?” But for me, this is the toughest stuff for me to learn.

In preparation for our small group discussion tonight, I came across these ‘faces’ of encouragement.

1. To believe in someone, to see their giftedness and ability to contribute.
2. To exhort someone, to build their character by confronting them even when it may involve saying hard things.
3. To comfort, console, give courage to.
4. To challenge, to urge, to entreat one to greater heights, deeper growth.
5. To express support and affirmation through tangible gifts.

My oldest son made a profound comment that reflects the view that many young leaders have of leadership and position. After the experience, I began to realize that we must learn misguided leadership principles early in life. He was hurrying to get in front of his little brother so that he could be the first one up the stairs to play.  Here’s what he said:

I’m the leader. That means I go first.

On a brighter note, Jack provides a great example of what leadership is. Try this link to the QuickTime movie file to watch and learn.

Early in my career (started in the work force in 1999), my competitive juices were so strong that it was very difficult to be excited about other people who found success or were able to attain certain achievements and goals. I had the corporate mentality of “climbing the ladder”; this thinking pitted me against others in the organization because we were competing for the same goal.

More recently, I took an adversarial role with colleagues. I didn’t feel like we were competing toward the same goal. Instead, I thought they were simply holding me back because of their inability to complete their job successfully.

I’ve changed. I don’t know why. But I have.

A couple of years ago, another young professional in the community and I began a friendship. He as the first outside my family with whom I was able to rejoice in his success was a dentist. For some reason, life isn’t about careers, job, money or position in our friendship. We both work hard and strive for success, but we have this unwritten commitment to helping each other navigate life. But I don’t feel threatened at all by his success. Instead, his successes encourage me and give me reason to “by him a cigar” and celebrate. His friendship began a change in me that continues to this day.

Now I am beginning to see people in our organization, people I work with everyday, as folks who are striving for the same thing. We all want to put bread on our table at home, we all want to help the company be successful, and we all want to feel a sense of accomplishment from what we do 8am-5pm.

I am writing this because of three people on my sub-team within the organization that have really triggered deeper thought on the subject. One gent that I’ve worked with for 5 years was given a promotion that rewarded his hard work, his success, and his ability to raise his level of responsibility. I have seen that and even hoped for his recognition by others. I do not view him as competition, but as a crucial ally in the quest for long-term success. Therefore, I rejoice that he has received this honor.

The other two are not needing or looking for promotion now, but are looking for growth and opportunity to add value to the company. Neither one works for me. So, you might think that we are competing for rank and position in the company. No, I see them as part of our team.

On our high-school soccer team, we all knew that in order to be successful as a team, we had to work together. We practised to help each other improve.
My goal and the desire deep within me is to give those on our team as many tools as possible so that they can achieve success. Hopefully, more success than I have achieved.

Competition with other businesses is fierce enough that I don’t need to also compete with my own team. Instead, we’ll work toward the same goal. And, when one of them hits receives that big honor or hits that major milestone, we will “rejoice with those who rejoice” and go buy some Cubans.

This morning I was thinking about someone I suggested we consider for a position in our company. My thoughts were on supporting him: “He’s a little quirky, but…”

That’s when I recalled something I learned a couple of years ago in discussion with friends. “…everyone is quirky but me.” I think all of us would say that because we are our own standard.

“As long as his quirks don’t impede his effectiveness, they shouldn’t be a road block to considering him.”